Eek!!! Do I have some MAJOR life updates for everyone here. What better way to share these updates, than sitting down with an iced latte and chatting over a pastry or two. So, here’s what I’d share with all of you, if we were having coffee.
If we were having coffee I’d tell you I’m dating someone!!!! I’ve been with my boyfriend for over a year now (14 months this past Sunday) and we’re oh so happy. Maybe embarrassing but also maybe not (I’m opting for the latter since I’ve always been an independent girlie) but he’s my first serious boyfriend ever and first boyfriend since high school LOL
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I’ve moved back to the suburbs. My boyfriend owns a home in the suburbs of Chicago and despite how much I loved the city, I felt that my time there had come to a close. I love how much cheaper things are, not having to pay for parking, and not having to budget an additional 30 minutes of driving time for ‘just in case’ of traffic time lol. We moved in together on our one-year anniversary in May and while it’s definitely been an adjustment of getting used to living with someone (other than my sister), it’s been super fun to live with him. He fully fenced in the backyard so the doggies have room to play and run outside and honestly, one major life goal achieved. I remember moving into my very first apartment with Poppy in 2021 and wishing that one day my super sweet anxious girl would have a big backyard. We still walk daily but it’s nice that not only do they have 2000 or so square feet inside to run around and play but they have a whole backyard to sniff, run around in, and bask in the sun on warm summer days. I think they might like living here more than I do.
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I finally did hit my goal weight (I hate that phrase). In the last 2 years I’ve lost a little over 120 pounds. I’ve been living in maintenance for the first time in my life (I’ve been trying to lose weight since I was 13) and it’s been the biggest adjustment of my life, not actively trying to lose weight. Now, I’m focusing on whole foods, lots of protein and lots of fiber, moving my body, and being balanced.
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I have started doing yoga. I’ve always LOVED yoga and have been practicing since I took “Mind and Body” as a gym class in high school. In the past, I never let myself ‘take yoga seriously’ because there were people that were better than me and people who could do certain poses (crow, hand/headstands) that I couldn’t do and thought yoga was only for super advanced yogis. HOW IN THE HELL did I think they got to be super advanced yogis? Oh, that’s right, by practicing yoga. Last month, my boyfriend and I went to a class that a coworker of ours teaches at and I fell in love with the studio. I went to 2 more classes at that studio and then bought an intro pack for the studio near my house and I’m hooked. It’s been less than 2 weeks and I’ve already been to seven classes and I can’t wait to go to more.
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I finished my Med in May. I went to graduation in December and had 1 more credit hour to take this past spring and I’m officially done. BUT WAIT – I’m starting my MBA next month, per a recommendation of a number of my coworkers. I love my job and want to stay here for the long haul. I think an MBA will help me stay here, get promoted, and learn the ins and outs of business that I’ve never really known about.
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I’m doing really really really well. I’m happy, physically, mentally, and emotionally doing well. I have been seeing my therapist weekly every week for the last almost 5 years (will be 5 years in October) and last year at some point suggested I’m doing well enough to only meet twice a week and I’m sure at some point soon we will probably only be meeting once per month. A lot of work by myself has been put into myself in the last five years and this is proof.
My most recent international trip was to Panama City, Panama, last February. It was technically a work trip, but we explored so much of Panama in just five days. I was even able to get a glimpse of Carnaval, which has always been a dream of mine. If you’re headed to Panama City, here are my top 5 must-dos.
Try Geisha coffee – It’s the most expensive coffee in the world, and for good reason. It’s the best coffee I’ve ever had in my life. It can be found at a ton of different coffee shops in major parts of the city. Give any [or multiple] of them a try.
Portobelo – What is thought to have been named by Columbus because of the deep blue color of the sea, now hosts the ruins of a Spanish castle, beautiful beaches, mangroves, and the most stunning coral reefs I’ve ever seen. I had never been scuba diving before, but THIS WAS INCREDIBLE. After spending the morning exploring the castle ruins, the town of Portobelo, etc., you can make your way over to Portobelo Beach to snorkel. Seeing the coral reefs and the many different tropical fish was truly a sight to see.
The Panama Canal – This is probably the biggest tourist area in the entire country, and for good reason. The Panama Canal was one of the highlights of my trip and one of the coolest things I have ever seen. Over 100 years ago, the Panama Canal was created, and to this day, it lets hundreds of boats and ships pass from one side of the country to the other. I stayed and watched the boats passing for over an hour before watching the Panama Canal movie that they show daily. The mechanisms by which the boats transport ships across the channels are insane, and I’m truly mind-blown that something of its kind exists.
Lago Gatún – Want to see pelicans, bats, monkeys, ships, cranes [metal, not aviary], and sloths? Lago Gatún is THE place to be. To get there, pass by ships coming or going from the Panama Canal, and get your binoculars ready to see some incredible flora and fauna. While I personally did not see a sloth [just one more reason to return], so many people do get the opportunity to see one, and honestly, the chance alone is worth the trip.
Plaza Herrera – This is what was described to me as the main plaza of “Downtown.” From Plaza Herrera, you can find numerous hotels, rooftop bars, coffee shops, handicraft stores, and much more. Every street you turn down is full of color, culture, and joy. I loved weaving my way in and out of stores, occasionally stopping to buy something in USD.
Have you ever been to Panama? If not, interested in doing any of this?
Typical Alicia, I haven’t posted for four months. I hope the end of 2023 and start of 2024 have been good for all of my readers. It’s insane to me that it’s already March. It’s been a whirlwind of a few months, and I have so much to share.
I quit teaching! WAHOOOOOOO. I left teaching last year and am so happy I did. I got a job working from home [it’s hybrid, but I’m only in the office 3 days a month] at an industrial supply company in the suburbs in their tax department. I love my department and all of my coworkers, and I have made so many new friends! It’s such a breeze from this job, and working from home gives me so much more freedom that I didn’t have while teaching. It’s also crazy that I’m trusted to do my job and just have a check-in once a month with my supervisor and other than that, I get to do my job. I really like everything I’ve learned about taxes so far, and I’m excited to be making $20,000 more than I was while teaching and I’m excited to see where my future takes me, either at this company or somewhere else.
I’m officially in my second semester of grad school. I’m soon to be 3 classes down and will finish this winter. I can’t wait to have an official graduation [I missed my undergrad graduation due to COVID] when I finish. I love my classes, and I think I want to get into instructional design or project management post-grad unless I decide I want to keep working with taxes for the rest of my career. Who knows? It’s also a plus that my company is paying for my entire tuition, which is a huge plus. I might even get my MBA after I finish this degree.
I’ve got some travel plans! In a couple of weeks, I’m headed to LA to visit two of my best friends from college. In May, my sister and I are headed to Europe. We’re going to France, Luxemburg, and England. And in July, I’m headed to Guatemala for the wedding of a friend of mine! I’m glad to be back to traveling, especially since my last trip was over a year ago.
My life has officially come full circle. My first ever blog [besides the summer bucket list blog I had with my best friend at the time in high school] was a weight loss blog. I would post daily about my food, weight, workouts, etc. I was DEEP in multiple eating disorders and really struggled with my food. In the past year, I’ve been losing weight again, in a much healthier way, and have lost 90 pounds! I’m about 30 pounds away from my goal weight and want to start sharing that part of my life here as well.
So… what does the future of this blog entail? Well, in true Alicia fashion, a lot of things. I’ve never been able to pick a niche, which is why this blog is a lifestyle blog, not a book/fitness/travel blog. I’d like to share all that encapsulates my life, from fitness, travel, post-grad life, books, and more. Take your coat off, stay a while, and welcome to a cute little rebrand of LivingOffLeesh.
Yesterday’s writing prompt of the day was: “What is your favorite hobby/pastime?”
If you learned anything from my two posts earlier this year, I love to read. I’ve always been a fan of contemporary and historical fiction, and earlier in 2022, I also dabbled in fantasy and romance.
When I was younger, I loved reading. Having “Library” every week was my favorite time to pick out a new book, and having a library on a Friday meant staying up until the wee hours of the night finishing that book. When I got to high school, that all changed. Yes, I enjoyed some books in high school, BUT I hated that our teachers chose all of the books. I spent most of my high school and college years reading the required material and reading under ten books for pleasure. After I graduated, I wanted to take back my love for reading, and since 2020, I have been slowly building up the books I read each year [7 in 2020, 15 in 2021, 100 in 2022], but after I made a goal of mine to read 31 books in August, I was burnt out from all the reading I had done. I read more after that, but maybe ten books in the last four months.
2023 started rough in terms of reading. So far this year, I’m only on my 12th book. I have a goal of reading 50… It’s better than 0 books but much lower than where I wanted to be. I read a blog post earlier today about someone posting mini-reviews of the book she had just read, and it got me thinking. I love writing reviews, but not 1000-word book blogger reviews. Anywho, I wanted to share five books I read recently and a mini-review of each.
The Martins: A book translated from French, written from a French writer’s POV, whose task is to ‘Go out into the street, and the first person you see will be the subject of your next book.’ He stumbles upon an elderly woman and ends up writing his book about her, her daughter’s family, and the twists and turns that a ‘typical’ family goes through. I adored this book and the mundane of it all. It’s funny; I initially thought I would be bored reading this book, but there’s beauty in the banality of life.
Binti: This trilogy of books was recommended to me by my grandpa. The first book took me months to get through [and initially sparked my reading slump] because of all the world-building, much like all fantasy books. Even the beginning of the second book was super slow, but, once again, like all fantasy books, at the end of the second book and all of. Third, the amount of action happening page after page kept me so engaged that I finished 200 pages in one day. A ton of African culture is incorporated into this novel, from names, locations and more. I’ve never read a fantasy book with this much of a real-life essence.
Beach Read: AUGUSTUS!!! I bought this book in 2021. I read the first few chapters in 2022. I finally got around to reading the entire book last month. I can’t remember why I couldn’t read it the first time because, OH MY GOD! This book!!!! I love Emily Henry with all my heart, and her books make my heart flutter. Augustus and January are my favorites; this book and their journey fill me with joy.
Carrie Soto is Back: First of all, Taylor Jenkins Reid is a goddess. The first book I ever cried at was The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. I’ve read a few of her novels, and Carrie Soto is Back is just as good as the others. After retiring from tennis at the top of her game, she has a lot of work to do despite some haters, bad mistakes, and maybe a little love. On page one, I fell in love with Carrie and kept loving her the entire book. Reid knows how to write characters, and Carrie Soto is no exception.
Better than Before: Long ago, I read The Happiness Project [and even wrote a review for it on the blog 😉 ]. Since then, I have loved Gretchen Rubin. In her book Better Than Before, she tackles the age-old question, “How do we change?” The answer is habits. Rubin discusses all of her tried and accurate habit-forming methods, and boy, was I influenced. You know it’s real when you have to stop reading to take notes. It was a good read and prepared me to form healthy habits.
Have you read any of these books? What are five books you recently read?
Happy Fall. Happy October. Happy times of change! It’s been quite a year for me.
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I went to Panama! My life goal is to visit one new country a year, and this year’s country was Panama. I went in February with a group of teachers and EF tours. It was a 5-day trip that was jam-packed with everything Panama City and more had to offer and it was lovely. Panama is an incredible country, and I’m so thankful I had the opportunity to visit
My friend Claire and I at the Panama Canal
If we were having coffee, I would tell you that I went to Disney World for the first time in 13 or so years. My best friends and I all flew down to Orlando for my spring break and went to Disney. It was a crazy week, filled with sun up to sun down walking, riding rides, drinking, and eating around the world.
My friends Grace, Jess, and I after a long day enjoying some milkshakes
If we were having coffee, I would tell you that last semester, I taught a class on… COFFEE. At my school, we have a 3-hour class every other Wednesday that focuses on student interests. With the help of a student, we created a coffee class. We learned about different types of coffee, made coffee, tasted coffee, got to tour the Starbucks roastery and got to tour a smaller roastery. I got to visit some coffee shops in the city that I’d wanted to visit for years, and on my school’s dime! How fun!
Inside the Starbucks Roastery of Chicago
If we were having coffee, I would tell you that I moved! I moved to the city’s Southside [Pilsen] with my sister. She is still in college but stayed with me over the summer and will stay with me for breaks before moving in with me full-time once she graduates in May. I love my apartment, its sunlight, how I’ve laid it out, and my bedroom!! My whole life, I have always dreamed of living in one of those corner apartments with the cylindrical group of windows that just exude sunlight and ‘princess’ vibes. It gives off a reading nook, and I knew I had to live there when I first saw the apartment. The amount of sun that comes into my apartment completely removes the need for lights until it’s dark out, and the way I’ve designed my apartment makes me feel right at home [apartment tour coming soon 😉 ]
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you I turned 26. Not only did I turn 26, but I also got the gift I’ve been wanting for my birthday for the past 13 years: an Edible Arrangement!!! Weird, I know, but it’s something I’ve always wanted.
In all her glory :’)
I got a second dog. In June, I saw a dog resembling Poppy, and I had to have him. Unfortunately, he was taken before I could meet him, but another dog was available. When I sat on the floor next to him, he put his head on my shoulder, and it was love at first touch. He had heartworm, so I knew I was in for a hell of a few months, but having already gone through that with Poppy made me 100% sure I could handle it. On June 24th, my sister, Poppy, and I drove home with our newest addition, Juniper. We’re not sure of his breed, but I think he has pitbull, beagle, and chihuahua in him. I will ask for a DNA kit for Christmas to get him tested because I was also sure about Poppy’s breed and then was 100% wrong. He just finished his heartworm treatment yesterday, so I officially have two healthy dogs. It’s definitely been an exciting ride, but I’m loving every second of it.
Juniper on the left and Poppy on the right
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that the walking group I’m a part of is getting major buzz. I’ve been with this group for over a year, and we reached 50K followers on Instagram. Two weeks ago, I led our biggest walk with roughly 400 people!!!! It’s so fun to lead walks, and I love getting the chance to meet new people in this big city.
If we were having coffee, I would tell you that I’m seeing my favorite band in the world on Sunday. Tomorrow morning, I am driving to Ohio to pick up my younger sister from school, and we are driving back here for The Band Camino’s concert. It’s tradition now, seeing as we went last year as well. I cannot wait to see them again, and I got VIP tickets, which means we get some merch and a 4-song acoustic set before the concert. I’M PUMPED.
I have a few other things I would love to chat about, but just in case I have some gossipers, I need to keep them quiet for the time being. A lot has changed in my life in the past year, and since I haven’t shared ALL of the changes with people in my real life, I will keep SOME of the changes private with the people in my online life. I hope that will change soon, but enjoy some boundaries and a little mystery in your lives for now.
I have always loved words. They have helped me convey a lot over the years. I’ve always been a reader. When I was in elementary school, I would borrow Black Beauty, The Wizard of Oz, any of the Dear America books, and so much more and would binge-read them at night. I loved picking books that piqued my interest in any way. I fell out of love with reading in high school when I started having mental health struggles and was forced to read 4 classics every year. I love the classics, don’t get me wrong, but The Awakening by Kate Chopin was the worst book I’ve ever read. I had to write my final paper on it in my junior year. AWFUL. I didn’t read much for pleasure throughout high school and college and I didn’t get back into reading until 2020. Over the past three years, I’ve read substantially more each year, and in 2022 I read 100 books. Some were incredible, some were trash, and some made it to my favorite books of all time. Here are my top 10 books of 2022 that I’d recommend EVERYONE read someday.
Big Summer by Jennifer Weiner
Wow. I picked this book up thinking it would be your quintessential cartoon cover novel and I was 100% wrong. This book had me a little bored in the first half, but then I was hit with the biggest plot twist EVER that had me wanting more for the rest of the book.
I absolutely ADORE Nick and Daphne and everything that is their relationship and I want another book that just shows them being happy [no plot just mundane life] and growing old [Think A Court of Frost and Starlight by SJM]. I’ve read two of her books now and got two more for Christmas. I’m so excited to go down this rabbit hole of Weinger books.
Book Lovers by Emily Henry
I loved People We Meet on Vacation because how can you not, as a teacher, love a book with a teacher in it. I’ve been looking forward to this book since I saw the title. As a book lover myself, [and traveler which I assumed it would cater to based off of the cover], I knew this was the book for me.
This book combines my favorite things [literature, small towns, big sister core, breaking the 4th wall] AND my favorite tropes [coworkers, enemies to lovers, I hate everyone but you] all in one book. Henry did it flawlessly, I might add.
I relate whole-heartedly to Nora in almost every aspect of her life and saw myself through her throughout the whole book [where is my “I hate everyone but you” literary boyfriend hmmm??]. She puts family first and is a people pleaser through and through. Her ending made me start to reconsider a few life choices I had made personally to please others as well… we’ll see how my ending plays out.
My sole complaint [in the book and about Libby] is the use of the name Libby. I hear Libby and I hear the toddler sister in Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging and that’s all I thought of while reading about her.
In conclusion, Charlie Lastra can get it 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. If I can’t have him, I’m glad my book twin Nora gets to.
It Happened One Summer by Tessa Bailey
I’m not even sure where to begin with this book. I have never been a cartoon cover romance reader until this year. I always stuck with gen fiction, classics, self-help, etc. BUT THIS BOOK. This book could convert anyone to read solely cartoon covers for the rest of their lives.
Piper starts off as this annoying rich girl who becomes IG famous by using the wealth of her stepdad. After a night in the slammer following a party Piper barely even remembers, her stepdad sends her [and her sister Hannah accompanies her out of pity] to the small fishing town of Westport, Washington, where her deceased father owned a dive bar. Brendan had my heart from the first page. The small-town fisherman trope I have decided is my new favorite and maybe I’ll be moving to Washington to live out this newfound dream of mine.
Piper and Brendan’s love story pulled at every heartstring. The constant struggle for Piper to figure out what’s truly important in her life: Hollywood or the man that’s treating her so well. Piper definitely needed a major attitude change, but she always put her sister first in everything. She learned to cook, clean, and revamp the bar, all to make sure her sister was proud and happy for her. Once Brendan finally got his head out of his ass and saw all that there was to Piper, there was no contest. There were definitely a couple of plot twists that I didn’t see coming but everything worked out in the end for me, and them.
They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera
Even though the book is called They Both Die at the End, I was CERTAIN that Rufus and Mateo were going to defy all odds and not die because I really didn’t think that Silvera would give away the ending on the cover and because I thought there was a way to not die at the end. I was sorely mistaken.
First, I love the writing in this book. POV chapters are my CRACK, and this was the cherry on top of the cake for this book. Rufus and Mateo remind me of Luca and Alberto in Luca where Alberto gets Luca to live in the same way that Rufus gets Mateo to live. Watching Mateo live his life on his last day while simultaneously falling in love with Rufus made my heart soar.
Mateo’s death was CRUEL. He deserved so much more than what he got. really thought they would die in each other’s arms in bed, and I was robbed of my happy-sad ending. I knew from the start that this was going to be a book that was going to break me and it sure as hell did that. The message of “Live each day to the fullest because you never know when it’s going to be your last” really stuck with me and I appreciate the message, I just wish that Mateo and Rufus didn’t have to die in order for me to get that message.
Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi
Before the Coffee Gets Cold is a quick and lovely read. It answers the questions that so many people think about, what would you change if you could go back in time? And in this book, four customers at a small café in Tokyo get to find out the answer to this question, with tons of stipulations. They have to sit in one particular seat [that is only open when the resident ghost gets up to use the bathroom, they cannot leave the café, and they must return to the present day before the coffee gets cold.
Four different visitors want to answer this old as time question. One wants to meet the daughter they never got to know, one wants to see their sister, one wants to receive a letter from their husband who in the present time, suffers from Alzheimer’s, and one wants to confront the man who left them.
I think about this question far too often. Who would I want to see or meet, what point in time would I go back to, and what could I screw up for the present day if I meddled with time? It’s a lovely book with a beautiful translation by Geoffrey Trousselot. I’m looking forward to reading Kawaguchi’s other books.
Beautiful World, Where Are You by Sally Rooney
This book gets so much hate, but I really wanted to read another Rooney book after reading Normal People and watching the Hulu series.
I read this book in a bit under five hours and for the first four hours or so, I was enamored. The characters, the plot, everything. I was SO shocked by all of the hate from the book. Then I read the last three chapters and it all made sense.
I love Rooney as an author. I love her characters [minus Felix trying to hit on Simon which was weird] and I love her style of writing in this book. My favorite types of books are those that change perspective, and the email chapters were great to get a mix of 1st and 3rd person in the book as well.
The ending felt so rushed and made no sense with the rest of the book. I won’t put any spoilers here but there were three tropes that were added haphazardly and were so unbelievable that I just could bare the end of the book. This book was about to be a comfort book and I might just reread it but stop at chapter 27, so I don’t have to endure the ending.
A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J Maas
If you’ve been on Goodreads, been to a bookstore, or talked to anyone about books last year, I’m sure you’ve heard of Sarah J Maas. She has taken over the Fantasy world [just like Colleen Hoover has taken over Romance…] and there are a lot of mixed reviews. I’m someone who has very mixed reviews on her as well. I don’t think she’s that great of a writer. Her books are overall pretty boring and there are 300 or more pages of world-building per book and the only actual plot takes place in the last 50 pages. However, she has great characters, and those last 50 pages are like being slapped in the face over and over and over again with plot twist after plot twist. I loved this series [her other series are meh but also must-reads and I can’t say why]
I love Feyre and Reysand and I recommend everyone read this series. It’s definitely Romantasy so if you’re into that, you’ll love it. Be prepared for a SLOWWWWW start but it gets better [400 pages later]
The Bee and the Fly: The Improbable Correspondence of Louisa May Alcott and Emily Dickinson by Lorraine Tosiello and Jane Cavolina
I bought this book thinking it was real. Obviously, I neglected the authors’ names at the bottom. But a book about the correspondence of one of my favorite authors? I had to have it. I devoured this book in a day. I love books with perspective and the letters to and from made my life. I love how the letters reflected both of their styles. Alcott wrote longer letters and Dickinson wrote shorter letters and usually included poems at the end. It was so convincing on both ends; it could have been real. You cannot convince me that Alcott and Dickinson didn’t know each other and didn’t correspond in some sense.
I applaud Tosiello and Cavolina for the amount of research that they must have conducted to make this book as good as it was. It was so hard to pick a favorite book but this is one of my all-time favorite books. While not very popular, my goal is to get this book on the map.
The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid
This was the first book of 2022 that made me cry. Monique Grant is having a rough time until she gets the job of a lifetime: to document Hollywood star Evelyn Hugo’s life and all her scandalous secrets, including the timeline of all of her seven husbands. Monique, while flattered is a little stunned. Why would this Hollywood icon choose Monique to document her life?
Monique spends days in Hugo’s home, listening to her retell her life story, from romance, friendships, her career, and forbidden love. With the right amount of plot twists along the way, it becomes clear why Monique was chosen for this job.
I was enamored with Marilyn Monroe as a child and Hugo’s story had me thinking of her. It made me feel closer to the Hollywood star that I obsessed over for years. This sparked my love for Taylor Jenkins Reid, and I look forward to reading her entire work
I’m Glad my Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy
Many people have this book tagged as “Funny” and “Lighthearted”; truthfully, I’m not sure we read the same book. It had me crying more than laughing, although I did chuckle a bit at all of her awkward stories about friends, relationships, and growing up.
There is something so comforting to me, a person with a nonexistent relationship with a mother due to a poor connection in the past, seeing someone who no longer has a relationship with their mother [for obviously different reasons ie. mine is living] heal from their relationship with their mother just as I am currently. It’s one of those “I’m not alone” moments. Amid “Happy Mother’s Day,” “Missing my mom today,” and “My Mother is my Best Friend” posts that always circulate my feed, there are books like these that remind me: NOT EVERYONE HAS A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR MOTHER. And I’m not a failure for not having one either.
I relate to Jennette in a lot of ways, more ways than I thought possible relating to a child Nickelodeon star. While we started out with different relationships with our mothers, they ended the same [I think], and we are both still working through all of the trauma that that relationship had on us.
As someone who has struggled with various eating disorders, going from anorexia to BED and feeling the complete and utter loss of control just as Jennette did and having your mother comment on it every step of the way, I felt that. From being told that you’re too much, or too big, or not good enough, I felt that. From learning at an early age that people pleasing and being a mediator [until you can’t take it anymore] is easier than dealing with narcissistic tendencies, I felt that.
It’s bittersweet in a way, having this book that so perfectly lays out my relationship with my mother. My heart aches for Jennette in all the ways that we are similar, but I am also grateful to know it’s not just me and that there are others who go through the same things with their mothers, and that we’re not alone in this experience.
Thank you, Jennette McCurdy, for writing one of the best books I’ve ever read. Thank you for being so open, so real, and so raw, in every aspect that matters when telling a memoir such as this.
I got an email confirmation from WordPress a few weeks back saying that my URL was being renewed for another year. I couldn’t help but find it silly that 20 or so dollars came out of my account, and I hadn’t posted since I last got that email in November of 2021. My last post was in July 2021, and it was a catch-up post about my life. I had just moved into my first-ever apartment [which I still live in] and that was that. Nothing since. I’ve logged in a few times but every time I try to put finger to the keyboard, I’m overcome with anxiety that I should be doing something else: work, cleaning, sleeping, working out, walking my dog, etc. Why can’t I just do something [like read or write] because I want to? Why must there be a higher purpose? If I want to sit on my couch, watch Dance Moms, and write a little blog post for a few hundred people to read, then why can’t I??? My goal in 2023 is to take care of myself: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Blogging does a lot for my mental health, and it makes me feel like I have a bit of a purpose. So, here’s to writing at least one post a month. If I write more, fab, but 1 post a month is my goal in 2023 and that’s that. So, for the first time in over a year, grab a coffee, and let’s chat.
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I’m actually no longer drinking coffee. I kind of stopped drinking coffee in October? I drink it rarely but not daily like I was before. I really only drink tea now and I’m feeling good about this decision. I love Chai now!
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I was diagnosed with PCOS last January. It’s been awful and I have so many more questions, but I love the online support community that surrounds PCOS. I’m learning so much about my body through it which is good, but it truly sucks that my body doesn’t function like others do. I would love to start posting about it here 🙂
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I’m reconsidering my profession. I think I’ve fallen out of love with teaching. It’s heartbreaking and I’m not sure if it’s my school or teaching, but I think a career change is in my future [that and my master’s degree for sure]. I’m having preemptive guilt because I love my coworkers and my students and the Spanish language and culture, but I come home every day exhausted [not to be mistaken for the lack of caffeine I’m drinking haha] and depressed. I don’t want to lead a life like that I’m not sure what’s in store for me next year but I really need to reevaluate my life and what’s important to me and see if teaching gets better for me.
If we were having coffee, I’d let it slide that I’m no longer vegan. WHAT?! Here’s the deal. I went vegan in 2015 when I was in the grips of an eating disorder. I used veganism as another method of starvation and ate protein bars, smoothies, and bananas, and called it a day. I maintained this veganism for 6 or so years, hating myself when I slipped up and ate something with milk in it. I made the decision for myself that right now, veganism is too restrictive for me. I am still vegetarian and will realistically never eat meat again. Once I work out all of my problems with food and body image and eating in general, maybe I’ll make my way back to being vegan, but right now, I need to not be as restrictive so I’m a happy little vegetarian at the moment and have been now for well over a year.
If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I’m ready to leave Chicago. When I was little, I always dreamed of moving to LA or NYC. That dream is long over. I want a backyard and grass for my dog to play in. I want to be within 30 minutes of an airport but without the hustle and bustle of Chicago. I want to be able to find parking dammit! I want things to cost a little less money. I love Chicago and always will, but Chicago isn’t [and never was] permanent for me. I never pictured myself here post-grad and I’d love to be in a city that feels like home. I’m not sure when I’ll move but I do know that I’m not staying in my tiny little apartment forever [which is bittersweet].
I’m sure there is so much more but that’s what I have today. I miss writing dearly, and every time I do open a blank document, it feels right, like this is what I’m supposed to be doing.
As part of my Happiness Project [more to come on that soon], part of the first task was to make a list of 21 things to do in the year 2021. I’ve done these before but normally they were huge goals. This year, I’m making a list of 21 things that I would like to accomplish [big or small]. I’ll check back on this list at the end of 2021 or earlier if I happen to finish them before then. Here goes my 21 things to accomplish in 2021.
Physical Health
Complete a workout program [any length, any kind, just complete it. Start to finish]
Figure out what is wrong with my stomach and get It fixed [remove a food, try a new diet, etc.]
Find a Workout class I enjoy
Cook one new recipe a month
Get the COVID vaccine
Eat less ‘added’ sugar
Stay sober
Complete Yoga with Adriene’s 30 day Breathe Yoga Journey
Mental Health
Read 20 books
Practice self-care daily [workout, reading, face mask, cooking, etc.]
Keep my social media hiatus until June [or longer]
Spiritual Health
Meditate or do yoga for one hour per week
Work
Figure out my next move- Grad school, Peace Corps, teaching in America, teaching abroad – who knows?
If I choose working… Get a job for the 2021-2022 school year.
Blog 50 times
Write 20,000 words in my novel
Play
Take a week-long vacation with my sister
Visit one new country [COVID pending]
Learn something new – Calligraphy, Crochet, How to Play piano – who knows?
Other
Pick my one-word theme for the year
Replace an item with something that makes more ‘sense’ at the time
I like the last one the most. My goals might change over the year and that’s okay!!! So, if that happens, I get a freebie change to use however I see most fit. I’m also hoping to blog about each of these as they are completed and I will add a new tab on my blog called “Happiness Project” soon for all posts related to my happiness project.
Hi all. While 2020 wasn’t anything like we’d expected [myself the least I think], I do think 2020 overall was a good year. While a lot of crap happened this year, a lot of good things happened as well. Of course, most of these from the comfort of my 8ft x 10ft bedroom, but good things, nonetheless.
I started off the year with a few of my best friends from high school, my first-time celebrating NYE at a bar… oh how I took that evening for granted. I also went on my first ever real date [sorry for ghosting you Adam but you only ever communicated over snapchat… big red flag for me] just before heading off to another country for another semester.
I spent my last semester of college completing my student teaching in Greece. Visiting other countries like Bulgaria, The Netherlands, and Belgium. I met some amazing people, Greek, American, Spanish, etc. while I was there. It was one of the best [and most eye-opening] experiences of my life. That of course got cut to an abrupt stop on a Thursday in March and I was then shipped back home after sobbing in the Thessaloniki airport when I thought there were no more flights back to America. Nonetheless, I made it back home, in one piece, and subsequently, I spent the next 9 months quarantining…
March, April, and May were spent by moping around, walking my dog, beating every video game I own, cleaning my room, graduating college [oh ou, oh yeah I forgot about this], and spending far too many hours scrolling through tik tok.
June and July were the first time I’ve seen real people since March [outside of my immediate family]. I celebrated my 23rd birthday with my parents and my sister at my favorite restaurant [thank god for it being on a corner and having outdoor seating] and then in July I visited some friends in Ohio and spent a week in Wisconsin at my cousin’s new home. July is also the last time I’ve had alcohol [and hopefully ever will].
August and September were a whirlwind of shipping my sister off to college, waiting for my visa for Spain to get approved, it finally getting approved, packing my life into a suitcase, duffle bag and my backpack until I finally left for Spain.
As we all know, October left me returning home from Spain for a multitude of personal reasons, which as much as I hate to admit, it was the best decision I could have made. October also consisted of me starting therapy and getting my first ever big girl job [Spanish Teacher at a K-12 school in Chicago]. I also deleted my social media which I still don’t use [and TikTok got the boot too].
November and December have been about getting into a routine of a 40 hour a week job while still taking time for myself and my growth. And now, here I am, sitting on my bed during my first vacation as a working adult, writing my first blog post in months.
2020 has been a year of personal growth, setting boundaries [for myself and others], and enjoying all of the little things.
I am hoping that 2021 is full of life, love, happiness, and goal achieving, no matter how big or small any of these are for me and for you.
Disclosure: some of the links below are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you,
I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase.
Over the past few months, I’ve been trying to treat my body as best as I can because I’m trying to love myself and part of loving yourself comes from treating your body right. I’ve been trying to eat a balanced amount of carbohydrates, proteins, and healthy fats. However, as a vegan, it can be a little harder to get in all of my protein daily, so, I usually have a protein shake or smoothie after my workout each day. I’m also trying to eat less processed foods which, unfortunately, a lot of vegan meats are high in chemicals and words I don’t know so, I was stuck in a rut with my diet for quite a bit.
I’ve used quite a few vegan proteins in my day however, there were none that I ever loved [either the price or the flavor] until this summer. While scrolling through vegan protein recommendations on a blog I was reading in April, I discovered Orgain Protein. Orgain protein is very plant-heavy and doesn’t have the chemicals that other proteins I’ve had have.
I’ve been using this protein for about five months and have loved every product I’ve tried. From their protein shakes, powders, and bars, everything is good!
My biggest thing when it comes to protein is taste. A lot of proteins don’t taste good and it can still be tasted when added to food. I’ve put the powders in smoothies and oatmeal and to my surprise, it tastes good!!! Depending on what flavor I use [PB or chocolate fudge are the powders I’ve tried and keep coming back to] it adds to the food I put it in and you can taste the chocolate or peanut butter in the food I’m eating. I also enjoy drinking their protein shakes plain or in a fruit smoothie with granola after a workout.
My favorite thing about Orgain protein is that there are tons of flavors and options for products. I love their creamy chocolate protein shake and their peanut butter chocolate vegan protein powder. The biggest thing I love about these is that they are soy-free [my stomach does not tolerate soy which is why I’m opting to eat less soy in my diet].
Overall, if you’re looking for a protein, in whatever form, I would recommend Orgain.
I loved them enough to become an ambassador. If you decide to give Orgain a shot, you can use my code: LIVINGOFFLEESH30 for 30% off your first order [they even had nonvegan protein and collagen]
I’ve become an absolute podcast fiend. I love having background noise in my life when doing mundane tasks like the dishes, cleaning, walking my dog, etc. and normally I would just play the TV. However, before I went to Spain, I started listening to podcasts regularly. I’ve learned so much from every episode and they’re so fun to listen to because it literally feels like you’re having a chat with the people on the podcast.
I’m a huge fan of The Health Code [Sarah’s Day and Kurt Tilse], A Whole Lotta BS [Brittney Saunders] and Let’s Do Life [Autumn Calabrese]. I also listened to part of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone [read aloud by some of the cast including Tom Felton and Daniel Radcliffe!] but that’s not what this post is about.
In one of the podcast episodes [I can’t remember which because this was a BS-before Spain- podcast I listened to] they discussed that people often focus too much on physical health, or too much on spiritual health or emotional health and neglect the other two. You can’t have one without the others. This is why people who go really hard in the gym but have terrible mental health [me] aren’t quite content with the results they get. However, when you focus equal time and energy to all three, they all work together and you yourself come together in a more wholesome form than when you just focused on one. I have always advocated for all three [to my friends not to myself] and I realized that I mostly only focus on one, which always differs depending on what season of life I’m in.
My goal for the rest of the year is to pour an equal amount of time, effort, and energy into my physical, mental, and emotional health so that I can be more whole.
In terms of physical health: filling my body with whole foods that make my body feel good [which unfortunately might mean cutting out soy partially because it doesn’t agree with my stomach], taking vitamins, and moving my body every day.
As for mental health: my social media detox, therapy, reading, writing, and getting a job [to have something occupying my time] top this list.
Finally, my spiritual health. I will be meditating, doing yoga, and journaling [manifesting]. I will also be more active in learning about my spiritual health. I recently have discovered that I’m more of a spiritual person. I always knew I wasn’t religious, but I think the universe plays a big role in everyone’s lives and I want to learn how to work with the universe not against it [something I’ve been doing for a while I think].
Please send me any and all podcast recommendations! I have a long way to go with the TBB podcast [there are over 200 episodes with each being roughly one hour long] but once I finish, I’m looking for some! I like more health and wellness focused podcasts but would be down for lifestyle, vegan, etc. As long as I learn at least one fun thing per episode that’s all I’m asking for.
Happy Monday, as most of you know, I’ve been very much into sustainable living and all that jazz. One of the things that can help you be more sustainable is by making household products yourself. I’ve made soap, shampoo, conditioner, etc. but I wanted to take a more foody approach this time so I made oat milk! You can make milk from anything these days but one of the most sustainable kinds of milk to drink is oat milk [it uses the least amount of water to make] and I had yet to find a brand or type I’ve enjoyed, so instead, I made my own. I scoured the internet for recipes and didn’t find one I particularly liked so in true Alicia fashion, I wung It and made my own recipe.
I wanted to share that this experience was far from the many photos I see on Instagram of people holding one of those antique milk jugs filled with oat milk and sipping away.
First and foremost, I would like to say that I would not recommend using a food processor. You HAVE to use a blender. I swear by my food processor and use it to make ice cream, smoothies, protein bars, etc. However, when it comes to blending liquid, do NOT use the food processor. I turned that bad boy on and there was oaty water all over the place. While my food processor is bigger than my blender, I should have just made multiple small batches in the blender rather than one big batch in my food processor because I wasted over half of it as it spewed all around my kitchen [and onto me].
Nevertheless, it did taste good and I’d make it again just in my blender because then hopefully the oats would grind up and mix in with the water a bit more than they did as well to make thicker and creamier oat milk [I want to put it in my coffee] which is what I was going for.
Ingredients
1 cup of oats [use more if you want it thick and creamy]
4 cups of water
2-3 pitted dates [depending on desired sweetness]
¼ teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon vanilla [I prefer my dairy-free milk to be vanilla flavored. If you don’t, you can omit this or add another flavor]
Shirt or cheesecloth [I used a both in my process and found an old -but clean- shirt can be much more useful because no oats get through the shirt whereas when I used the cheesecloth, a little did get through]
Jar [I used a quart ball jar]
Directions:
Place all food ingredients in the blender and blend until white.
Add more oats or more water until you reach your desired consistency
Place shirt or cheesecloth over the jar and slowly add milk onto the cheesecloth/shirt until there is no more liquid in your blender.
Enjoy!
It’s quite simple [when you know what you’re doing] so I went through the troubles of being an idiot so you all don’t have to!
Have you ever made dairy-free milk? How did it go? ❤ Alicia
I’m officially back in America and readjusting to everything I just left. I’m unpacking, spending much needed time with my dog [I always forget how much of a de-stressor she is until I am so stressed out that I’m in tears] and I’m slowly getting into a routine.
Something that I think is so toxic to me at this point in my life is social media. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again and I’m a very black and white person so I’m either on social media for 1912912 hours a day or none at all. While I do enjoy Instagram for keeping up with my friends’ lives and Twitter is great for the news and a good laugh, I really can’t take it right now. I spend hours upon hours scrolling through social media and I really can’t stand it because it’s the biggest waste of time [I’m looking at you TikTok].
I’ve decided to take a bit of a social media hiatus [I’m keeping Snapchat for the time being because I don’t look at stories, I just send a picture or two to the same seven people every day and get on with my life but that might change… who knows? I’ll also keep TikTok because to me that’s not social media and I just watch Draco Malfoy, Harry Styles, and Robert Pattinson compilations so how bad is that? Both of these apps will be getting a screen time limit and the password will be chosen by my sister because it is far too easy to enter that screen time password and keep watching TikToks for hours upon hours not that I’m speaking from personal knowledge 😉 ]
Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter will be gone for a while. I did it almost four years ago for a whole summer and I think it was beneficial for my mental health. I also read and wrote a lot more, worked out more, was present, etc. I don’t think social media is the worst thing in the world by any means BUT I do think a hiatus can be an amazing thing every so often.
And of course, I’ll still be blogging as much as I can. I’m hoping therapy can spark a bit more motivation in me than what I’ve had.
Have you ever done a social media detox/hiatus? How’d it go? ❤ Alicia
Hi all. If you remember me talking about my BIG move to Spain to teach at a university here, well… it happened. I’m currently sitting in my Airbnb in Ciudad Real, Spain as I type this. I’ve been here for one week, and I’ve fallen in love with this city.
I’m not typing this post as means of a WOOHOO I’m in Spain… quite the latter. Unfortunately, I will be heading home. I don’t really want to get into why because I’ve been stressing for the past few days about it. I’m heading home and my life in Spain will have gone just as quickly as it came.
Although I’m very disheartened that this journey of mine is coming to a rather abrupt halt, I’m seeing the good in this whole situation and there are actually a lot of upsides to this situation I’ve found out.
I get to see my dog on WEDNESDAY. She is going to be so confused as to why I cried about leaving her for over an hour [I spent almost every waking minute with her since I started quarantining on March 18th… give me a break] and now I’m home so quick.
I get to see my aunt’s dog on Wednesday as well. My aunt got surgery and is going to be in rehab for about a month so until then, TWO dogs.
I get to make more money than I would have while in Spain. No matter what I do, I’ll be making more money in America per paycheck than per month in Spain [not that I cared about that, I wanted this experience more than any amount of money].
~Hopefully~, I get to take a trip to Europe with my sister next summer. She’s always wanted to go to Paris, and I have a hankering to go to London and all of the UK, so hopefully, we’ll be able to head over there for a few weeks. We can take the HARRY POTTER tour, go to Harry Styles’ bakery, and see the Louvre. Also, she’s my personal photographer so the Instagram content from that trip would be AMAZING.
I get to VOTE. I left for Spain before early voting started in my county and I was unsure if my mail-in ballot would make it to Spain and back to America in time once I got my address. However, when I get home, I’ll head straight to the early voting polls and get to ~hopefully~ vote out 45.
I am going to be able to focus on me. I probably won’t be able to get a full-time teaching job [since the semester is halfway over] nor do I want one in the condition America is in right now as to not risk getting COVID in a room with 25 germ spreaders. I’ll probably find something part-time [retail, babysitting /e-learning help, substitute teaching, etc.] and I will have plenty of time to take care of myself. I will be going to therapy [probably twice per week to start], exercising, eating right, reading, writing, and doing everything that I love.
I might write a novel! I have always wanted to participate in NaNoWriMo and because COVID will most likely still be terrorizing America next month, I should have enough time to do it. I also have a great idea [or at least I think I do] so once I create some characters, figure out the rest of the plot, etc. NaNoWriMo here I come.
Finally, while talking to my sister last night [amidst my mental breakdown from this hectic week I’ve had] and she said I looked sad and emotionally drained. Honestly, I am. I don’t think it’s just from this week but from everything built up that I’m finally starting to recognize. It’s very easy to put your mental health off in college because it’s “cute and quirky” to be depressed and to be anxious and to be so stressed you cry. When you’ve graduated… girl, go to therapy. Also, this past week I’ve been alone most of the time. COVID is preventing me from going out and meeting people and every ‘tourist’ activity I want to do is also closed so I’ve been spending a lot of time in my hotel room, pent up with just my thoughts. And let me tell you, my brain needs a lot of help at the moment. I love traveling but my sister told me that I use traveling to put off getting mental help. It’s true [I hate it when little siblings are correct]. I live off that travel high long after I return and when I get back into my head aging, away I go on a new trip. So, while I wish I could have been living in Spain and working on me, I think for myself [present and future] I’m going to benefit the most from being home for the foreseeable future.
I think I’m meant to live in Spain for an extended period… I do. However, this year just isn’t it. I will return one day to Spain but it might not be this year or even next year. Whether I return to Spain as a tourist or to teach again, I know I’ll be back one day. J
España, te quiero mucho y regresaré un día. ❤ Alicia
Happy Tuesday. Now I know most of us aren’t doing much [if any] travel these days, so keep this bad boy saved for when you’re flying next. I, however, will be making another trip to Spain in the coming weeks. I was originally supposed to leave in six days, however, my visa has still yet to be approved so I’ll be heading there before the end of the month if plan B goes smoothly.
Something I’ve become quite good at is flying. I’ve loved flying ever since I was little, however, when I first started solo traveling [flying to and from San Diego when this blog was just a baby] I had no idea what the hell I was doing. I would bring so much stuff in my carry on “just in case” that I never ended up using // needing. After 20 or more [ I have no idea if I’m being honest] solo flights around the US, South America, and Europe, I’ve come to know what things are essential for your flight and what can stay at home or in your checked baggage. Here are my top 5 carry on flight essentials.
Snacks – This will forever and always be my #1 flight essential. I’m going to count gum in this category too because I cannot and will not fly without a pack of gum for take-off and landing. For super long overseas flights or for flights with layovers, bringing snacks from home is always the better and cheaper option. Food and drinks in airports are EXPENSIVE and depending on the country’s exchange rate, just not even worth it. Because of this, I always bring an empty water bottle [to fill up after security] and a few snacks [some sweet, some savory] such as dried fruit, nuts, crackers, etc. anything to fill me up and get me to where I’m going. I find that when you have dietary restrictions such as myself, it’s even more important that you bring these on flight snacks. Just because they offer a vegan or gluten free or whatever meal option, does, BY NO MEANS, mean it will be a good one.
Chargers – My favorite thing about longer flights is that they normally have a charging port on the seat back in front of you. My flight to Greece was 11 hours and I’m stupid and forgot to check in 24 hours in advance which meant a middle seat for me. It was miserable and I couldn’t get comfortable enough to take a nap. Therefore, I spent the 11 hours watching 6 movies, playing games on my phone, listening to music etc. When I switched my time to watching movies, I plugged in my phone so that it wouldn’t die during my layover or before I got to my new apartment.
A book // E-reader – Not everyone loves reading on airplanes, but I personally do. I try to grab my computer and write on flights normally but not all planes have enough room to have a laptop out and elbows jabbing when you’re typing. I always carry a book in my bag for those tight spaces on airplanes and when you can’t get Wi-Fi at your layover airport [or if you have a 4-hour layover and only are allowed 1 hour of Wi-Fi … thanks Istanbul]
Headphones – A lot of longer flights will gives you headphones to watch movies, listen to music, etc. They almost always suck. I always bring two pairs of headphones [my AirPods for my phone and a pair that works for the traditional headphone jack] so that I can enjoy movies on the plane and have headphones that I can actually hear out of both sides.
A ‘just in case’ bag – this is 100% the most important in my opinion. The last thing you want to happen is for your luggage to get lost and you’re without a toothbrush, underwear, or deodorant. In my carry on, I always carry a bag of miscellaneous items I might need on the flight or after if my luggage is lost. This usually consists of: a hairbrush, bobby pins, toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, travel shampoo + conditioner, tissues, soap, lotion, hair ties, hand sanitizer, Clorox wipes, etc. I then have an extra outfit [usually just bra, underwear, socks, t shirt and leggings] in case something happens to the clothes I’m wearing, or my luggage gets misplaced.
Obviously, each person’s carry on will depend on you and your interests, but I have to think that these items are pretty much universal, and anyone can and will need one or all of these at some point while travelling.
I’m not sure what’s in store for me next year but I really need to reevaluate my life and what’s important to me and see if teaching gets better for me.
Living off Leesh 